didn't make it to staples, CVS or the car wash
forget the errands i was going to run for my mom as a favor. i could barely make it to the bagel store. i've come home and gotten back in my pj's. i hate how i'm living. i hate having no energy and no desire to live. not even no desire to live, per se, but seemingly, no ability.
i just can't. it's all so draining.
so fuck it. today, i'm going to crawl back into bed, watch tv, eat my bagel and dope myself up on xanax until the world feels at least semi-okay again.
i hate this.
i can't believe the excuse "i'm so tired" has worked on my family for so long. i hope that when i explain to them WHY i'm leaving and why i'm moving to san diego, they can look back on these past few months, and understand...
i want to just curl up in a ball and cry. nothing makes sense anymore. why am i...?
why am i...?
i can't even finish a complete question. i don't even know what the question is.
posted by: less-than3
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