i will never know, 'cause you will never show
soft thunder in the distance. sporadic flashes of lightning. and the wind is blowing in the right direction. the cool air is floating into my living room. it smells like rain.
i swear i think i'm going to have an orgasm from it all...
i even made an effort with dinner. i made chips with salsa, refried beans and sour cream. a far cry from my usual shredded wheat.
so tonight, i'm going to just geek out. do some reading. do some writing. perhaps partake of a beverage in the new glasses L got me as a housewarming gift.
(they're cute, aren't they? thanks L!)
so i'll be here. pester me with IMs and stuff.
i had a huge revelation earlier. the reason for all my histrionics. my drama. my insecurities. and so on and so on...
i am terrified of being happy.
not just scared. TERRIFIED. moreso that i probably ever figured i was. don't know why. i was just finally able to pinpoint it. sum it up in one sentence.
but right now, i'm pretty peaceful. not great. but not horrific.
(i'm here)
posted by: less-than3
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