round here
sometimes, other employees' music is loud enough to hear, which is fine, most of the time. but yesterday, EvilCoworkerBoy played a song that provoked two reactions in me.
1. i wanted to run up to him, slap him in the face, and kick him in the balls.
2. i wanted to run into the bathroom and cry.
why? because it was a song you sang. at karaoke night. maybe you think that's silly, for a song to bring about such a response like that in me. but songs hold memories, and when i heard adam duritz's voice, my mind drifted back to you singing. singing this song, that i don't even LIKE that much. my least favorite counting crows song -- and i told you that.
after you finished singing, i remember telling you "you made me actually LIKE that song." that's a compliment, you know.
so, hearing that song at work, in an environment that makes me unhappy, being played by a person that makes me unhappy -- it was as if my memories were getting tainted, somehow. and i didn't like it. not one bit. some things just shouldn't be fucked with. like my happy memories. and i know that i'm too sensitive to the smallest things like that -- but i'm not going to let my memories surrounding THAT song be tainted, just because a stupid asshole played it at work.
does any of that make sense? i'm not explaining it well, i don't think. i want to keep the happy separate from the unhappy. when i leave here, i want to leave it all behind.
songs make me miss you. songs make me excited to see you. songs make me excited to get on the road and head off towards my future. songs make me reminisce about the good 'ol days in college (how old did that just make me sound). songs break my heart. songs fix it.
songs are associated with everything in me. and that's something so sacred to me. it means THAT much to me.
posted by: less-than3
[if you like what you read, please clix me!]
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