music box
all the shows were great. four one-acts. dramas and comedies, ridiculous and bold. the acting was amazing as usual. i swear, they all blow me away every time that i watch the company perform.
both nights, afterwards, we went to karaoke. thank GOD. something to redeem MYself and make me feel better. heh. make ME feel not quite so talentless. friday night we met an awesome couple, and the girl is my new white-girl-soul-sista. and she's new to SD, too. she and her hubby just moved her from chicago, so we were both just ecstatic to meet eachother and bond over music and being newbies to the city. it was totally meant to be that we met. i sang a new song on friday night, "buffalo stance" (neneh cherry) -- i never sung that song before, and it was a lot of fun. trying to sing and rap all fast and british whilst intoxicated.
saturday night, most of the cast came out to karaoke as well, which made the night SUPER fun. and there was something in the air at the bar, i swear. everyone was nuts, and hyped up. it was a crazy night, i don't know if everyone there was just extra crunk or what! but it was great. one girl, a regular at the bar, told me that i OWN "at last" (by etta james, a song i often do), and asked me if i was in a band. i said no, and she gave me an evil eye. she IS in a band, and sings bluesy and soul like you wouldn't believe! she makes you want to go to confession! i told her, "I SWEAR! it's on the list! i want to be in a band!" she said, "you better!"
the last song i sang was "i try" by macy gray. and that was SO much fun, because, i swear, the ENTIRE bar sang along with me on the chorus. now, i'm used to that, on songs like "killing me softly" -- on the fugees' version where they go "ONE TIME!...TWO TIMES!" but i hadn't sang "i try" at this bar before, but everyone sang with me, and it was awesome. so they're all singing the chorus, and i'm ad-libbing around it, and i just couldn't help smiling and afterwards i just said, "guys that was the most fun sing-along i've ever heard!"
i'm getting more and more compliments lately. i like going to this one particular bar for karaoke, because 95% of the people who sing there are REALLY good. it's not CRAP karaoke. it's bonafide entertainment. so of course, all of us "regulars" -- i guess i can consider myself somewhat of a regular now, are always cheering each other on. but even random people i don't know come up to me. that's how i'm meeting people. someone came up to me last week and told me that they would buy my CD in a heartbeat.
*sniffle*
so now, i just have to go and MAKE one! HA!
it's funny. i used to be so shy. so insecure. okay, well i'm still insecure, no doubt, in MANY MANY ways. but, when i was in high school, my junior year, i gathered up the courage to try out for the a cappella choir. that was the select, "we are the shiznazzle" choir. they won awards, the whole nine yards.
to audition, you had to sing the scales for your voice part, then sing this song along to a tape (with your voice part missing, of course, to see if you blend), and then a song of your choice, without accompanyment (hence a cappella). i sang "happy birthday" for christ's sake! haha! but i got in. not only did i get in, but at the first rehearsal, our director announced who got the highest audition score that year...and it was ME. the girl that barely anyone knew who she was, was all of a sudden KNOWN. i was never one of the director's "favorites" -- because i wasn't a suck-up, but from then on, things changed for me. i gained confidence, because all of a sudden, i had validation. something i loved to do all my life, and something i honestly believed, deep down inside of me, that i was truly good at, was confirmed by others. my senior year, i made it a point to befriend all the new members of the choir, from freshmen to seniors. i wasn't about to let anyone feel trepidation or nerves or insecurity. because even though i had been "let in" -- i was never part of the "inner circle". so i made a circle of my own. i got to know them, i made them feel welcome.
i did the same thing in choir in college. except in college, i was lucky in that my director actually LIKED me. she recognized my talents, and didn't try to change me or mold me into what SHE wanted (as my high school director did with many of her minions). and so i took a lead role, but not in a "i am the shit" kind of way. again, i just lead by example, or tried to. be who you are. be proud of your voice. sing loud and strong and love the music. have FUN with it. and god, did we ever. we had such a bond, all of us. the choir concerts in college were a BLAST. we were a bunch of nuts; we danced as we stood up there on the risers. we were animated, and our director loved us for it. i think part of that is because our director was as crazy (if not crazier) than we were. she is a loud and crass crazy woman from northeastern pennsylvania. but she's a classically trained (juliard!) musical genius.
music was always my escape from sadness and ridicule. it also ended up being my escape from shyness, and my path to confidence. i am who i am today -- the POSITIVE aspects of who i am, because of it. because of being able to sing. the gift that i was given -- my love of music, and the ability to express it through my voice and through performance -- led to another gift. that gift was being able to reach out to other people. it's how i connect with people, bond with them, and make friends.
i'm lucky that way. i don't take it for granted. i don't know what i'd do without it.
posted by: less-than3
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