the closest thing to perfect, but the farthest thing from me

it has been raining. looks like the sky is clearing a bit. i'm sitting in pitch darkness, save for the computer screen and a single votive candle. it just seems to fit tonight.

i've cried myself to sleep every night so far this week. damn the moon. damn me.

48 hours from now, i'll be on a plane, almost in puerto rico. i'm terrified. i'm so scared of flying. poor L. she has to put up with me. i'll be gripping her hand so hard. (sorry in advance)

i'm dreading this trip. not really. let me try to explain. yes, there are some mandatory "company bonding" BS parts to this trip. a 3 hour activity and a dinner. the rest of the time is mine. well, mine and L's. this is where we'll be.

pretty, isn't it?

it promises to be a very good time.

i guess i'm just a little upset that no one is going to miss me. yes, the same gripe as always -- i don't live near anyone i care about.

(my own stupid-ass fault, but that's another story altogether. one that most of you know already anyway)

i don't even think most of my friends know that i'm going away. i'll be returning, on tuesday night, to an empty apartment, and an empty town.

me being in puerto rico doesn't change anything for anyone. it doesn't make anyone miss me more (or at all). because i'm still just that random girl who's not nearby. to anyone.

100 miles or 1000 miles, it doesn't really make a difference, now does it?

posted by: less-than3

spoke the truth!

[if you like what you read, please clix me!]

9:11 p.m.
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