looking back at me, i see that i never really got it right
sometimes i feel as if my heart is going to leap out of my body and swallow me whole. it's not a calm emotion - i am violently teary. quietly shaking in bed. sitting on the floor, wailing. frantic words typed - spellcheck be damned.
the diet pepsi is tasting like coconut. maybe that's last night's aftertaste-memory. i need sodium. i'm jittery. i need more...sleep. vanilla-tinged cloud dreams. love, a feeling so gentle, yet so volitile. i hate the rain and the 50-degree days that i'm living. it's may; it should be warm sunlight and midnight dances.
tomorrow's friday - does it matter? does a holiday differentiate a weekend? does a break differentiate a heart? will a kiss seal the deal so i can sing once again? it's buzzing in my ears again. words spit out at random - it means nothing at all. throw it all together and it's incoherent, drenched in static.
i need a snack. i found a convenience store on the other side of town.
i've been having strange dreams lately. the chiropractor in those dreams is doing a better job at cracking my back than my actual chiropractor is.
i'm sick of all the songs on my iTunes. quench me with something new.
curl me up to a tear-spotted pillow and wrap your blanket around me. make it all better, please.
i don't know what else to say or do.
posted by: less-than3
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